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Phrase(s): If frogs had wheels, they wouldn’t bump their butts. [and] If a toady frog had wings, he wouldn’t bump his ass.
Rur. It is useless to wish for impossible things. (Use caution with ass.) • Tom: If I had two hundred thousand dollars, I could buy that farm. Jane: Yeah, and if frogs had wheels, they wouldn’t bump their butts. • Charlie: If I were rich and famous, I’d make people listen to me. Bill: If a toady frog had wings, he wouldn’t bump his ass.
McGrawhill's American Idioms And Phrasal Verbs